By now I’m sure you’ve seen it – a big ugly barge stationed in San Francisco’s bay just off of Treasure Island that is supposedly owned by Google (of Google search fame). It was originally surmised to be a floating data center, because what goes better together than servers and copious amounts of water? Since then it has been upgraded to being a Google Glass store, but at the very least we know it’s shrouded in the kind of secrecy that makes techie’s engines rev with the hunger of being the first one to find out.
The barge, and another similar one in Portland, Maine, are not explicitly the secret property of Google. Both floating behemoths live in hangars leased by a company called, “By N Large,” which Pixar enthusiasts will recognize as the major corporation from the movie Wall-E. There is no information available online about this mysterious company, but CNET was able to link the company to Mountain View’s Google.
Google is being fastidious in keeping a tight lip, and none of my friends who work there are telling me anything, so I figure it’s my civic duty to brainstorm what is possibly going on over there. Until we get confirmation that these barges do in fact house servers or stores for Google Glass, I will operate under the possibility of any of the following theories being the reason for the barge:
1) Sergey Brin’s pleasure skiff where he brings subordinates he’s romantically involved with
2) Testing facility for the first Google Robots, which will eventually replace the workforce
3) Floating fallout shelter for Google execs after the impending apocalypse
4) Offshore casino getting prepped for this year’s Google Christmas party
5) Eugenics laboratory researching how to breed the perfect engineer
6) SuperPrison for anyone who violates copyright laws on YouTube
7) Beta test for Google Ferries, to replace Google Buses (at least they won’t crowd the streets)
8) Death Star attempt 1. Note: may or may not have exhaust port only 2 meters in diameter
9) Relocation of company daycare, because they gotta learn to swim sometime
10) Giant empty box as a prank to make people think way too hard/write blogs about something pointless
So there you have it. All of these are equally likely to be true, so I plan on heading out there to urban explore the situation so expect some fuzzy iPhone pictures in the near future. Feel free to share your own theories below!